Older Yet Wiser?

I am a member of the 'boomer generation' ...this includes anyone who was born between 1949 and 1963. I was born in 1958, which makes me 51. This wouldn't be too bad except I have been ill most of my life and medications have aged my body beyond my years. So I may be 51, but physically, I'm around 80.

Menopause is a faint memory, having gone through it in my 30's, and now I'm looking at the remainder of my life as if it was the last slope on a rollercoaster. Going downhill waaay too fast for me!

This morning what's on my mind is the whole aging process. You get older, you get wiser and your life should generally improve. Older people retire, go on cruises, play golf, nap whenever they want, join old people's clubs and enjoy the empty nest--or so I thought.

These days, I'm finding out that it's becoming more common for multi generations to be living together under the same roof. Grandparents, (Great-Grandparents in some cases), parents and grandchildren all living together. My grandchildren live with me, as do both of my grown daughters. I couldn't imagine it any other way, to be honest--in spite of the fact that some days I long to be alone.

With grandchildren underfoot, unique and interesting experiences can crop up at any given time; and both grandparent and grandchild can be frightfully disillusioned at the lack of mystery this can create. My grandsons see me in the morning, which can be a scary experience...they tend to know when I've had a "depends" moment despite my attempts at discretion : "Gramma! You're supposed to use the potty!!" Of course, I am aware when they have 'accidents', much to their horror. Humiliation and embarrassment tend to hit both our generations regularly, it seems.

I recall a day last summer, when I was sitting in the swimming pool with the boys enjoying the hot afternoon. My oldest grandson glided up to me and suddenly was taken aback and gave me a long, thoughtful look.

"Gramma" he said, "Are you a man?"
"What?" I said, confused. "No! Why would you think that?"
"Cause you have a moustache, just like Poppy's" He said, still eyeballing my upper lip with wide eyes.

Grandchildren say what's on their minds, they don't edit their thoughts--much to my dismay at times. Excusing myself in a restaurant recently to use the bathroom, I return to the table where my youngest grandson asks me quite loudly, "Did you stink it up like you do at home?" Then he burst into hysterics. Smartass at four, already.

I find getting older is insulting most of the time. You get hair where you're not supposed to, which is doubly-humiliating if you're a woman. The hair you're supposed to have starts getting thinner (on top and down below). Your hair turns gray... everywhere! My husband was kind enough to point that fact out when I was in my 30's. I attempted to dye my hair down there, and ended up hopping all over the bathroom because my crotch was on fire for that 25 minutes. Then, it only dyed the hair that was my natural color, leaving a gray streak right down the middle. *sigh* I'll never do that again!

There is a multitude of humiliations at becoming an old person, but on the plus side (yes, there is one) the kiddies run to Gramma for comfort, I can give them candy or soda and leave them with their mom for a few hours...*grin* and Christmas, Easter and the first snowfall brings with it the ability to play like a child and blame it on senility. I have some hearing loss, but can use that to my advantage when I choose to ignore when someone is talking to me. I can avoid crappy chores by simply hobbling around the house and acting like a cripple.

All in all, I'd rather be where I am in life now, than be young and weighed down with a miserable marriage and responsibilities of a family while hubby parked his ass in the chair in front of the TV while I cooked, cleaned and supervised homework. I can still do those things, but now by choice instead of a 'have to'. But I wouldn't complain if I woke up one morning looking like Catherine-Zeta Jones, instead of Ma Kettle.